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Anxiety is part of the human journey although sometimes the term “anxiety” can be watered down. People have concerns such as financial security, job stability, personal relationships, parenting responsibilities, and health and safety concerns that occupy their minds daily. However, not all fears can be classified as anxiety.
Anxiety disorders include conditions characterized by fear and anxiety that disrupt an individual’s overall health. In children, this anxiety may affect their ability to attend school, affecting their friends’ quality of sleep at night or concentrating in class. Among adults it can affect areas such as work performance, romantic relationships, social interactions, financial issues, and physical health. Anxiety manifests itself in ways – physical, emotional, and behavioral – with many conditions falling into the category of “anxiety disorders.”
A common question parents ask is whether their anxiety can cause anxiety in their children. Research suggests there is an element of anxiety. Genetic studies have found that heritability rates range from 30% to 67% for anxiety disorders. If a child has a relative who has been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, it increases the likelihood that the child will experience anxiety throughout his life.
Another important question is whether anxiety is contagious. It is enough that it is not determined solely by genetics alone.
The relationship between parents and their children can affect each other’s anxiety levels when they live together. A study published in the American Journal of Psychiatry examined 900 families with twins as parents to understand how environmental factors contribute to anxiety. The results strongly support the idea that anxiety can be transmitted from parent to child via the environment regardless of factors. Furthermore, research suggests that anxious traits can be learned and that a child’s anxiety can exacerbate a parent’s feelings of anxiety. But there is a side to this; Parents have the ability to proactively reduce their children’s anxiety by modifying their reactions and demonstrating flexible coping strategies.
Anxious talk
Children have a knack for eavesdropping at inopportune moments. You can repeat instructions over and over and not get a response, but it’s amazing how they can listen when you least expect it especially during adults-only conversations.
It’s important to have a listener when discussing troubling thoughts, but realize that children often fill in the gaps when they hear snippets of upsetting news. While it is helpful for adults to speak out about concerns such as school shootings, we need to be careful about bringing up such topics around children because it may increase their anxiety.
Children tend to internalize their parents’ fears. He may absorb these frightening narratives.
Avoidance patterns
When we encounter fears, our natural instinct is often to avoid them. We tend to justify this avoidance by pointing to the root cause of our fear. For example, if you had a childhood experience where you were bitten by a dog, it is understandable that you might view dogs as unpredictable. These shock-based reactions are very common. But the downside is that children can pick up these patterns and begin to believe that all dogs are a threat and should be avoided.
Dealing with a phobia requires patience and effort. To prevent passing these fears on to your children, it’s important to work with your partner or another trusted adult. This way you can ensure that your children have experiences when they encounter your triggers. For example, if you have a fear of dogs, your partner can introduce your children to animals at an adoption event to help them overcome any fears about unpredictability.
Protective behaviors
Some parenting practices that promote anxiety include actions intended to protect children from potential dangers. For example, constantly telling children to stop playing or setting limits on how loud they can play are examples of overprotection. The basic message is clear: play is dangerous and can lead to injury.
Children benefit from experiencing calculated risks so they can evaluate their limits and make good decisions. Overprotecting them from imagined threats can inadvertently reinforce a risk-averse mindset.
By taking the following steps, parents can reduce the transmission of anxious behaviors to the environment:
How to avoid going through anxiety
It can be helpful to keep a record of the things that tend to make you feel anxious. This way you can better understand what’s worrying you and see where you might need some support. Anxiety can stem from fears, as well as from certain places or situations, where there are high levels of stress or interactions with people.
When you find yourself feeling anxious, take a minute to write down the events that happened at the time they happened and any thoughts or actions that preceded the onset of your anxiety symptoms. By identifying patterns in these situations, you will be able to identify trigger points more effectively.
Encourage positive challenges
When we encourage children to push themselves and independently evaluate their strengths and weaknesses, they discover ways to thrive in life. If you feel anxious watching your child climb a rock wall, consider inviting a buddy to the playground and walk when anxiety occurs. If socializing at gatherings is a challenge but you want your children to adapt to group settings, consider letting them attend parties alone or with your partner or other caregiver.
Motivating children is crucial for them to face challenges. Although you may not be able to join them on exciting rides, it is essential that you provide them with opportunities to experience these adventures.
Talk about healthy coping skills
We all have moments of anxiety and growing up can be challenging at times. It’s not always easy. When parents show us effective ways to manage and cope with stress, we learn that we have the power to deal with our triggers. Here are some techniques that can help:
- Do breathing exercises; Inhale for four counts, hold for four counts, then exhale for four counts.
- Try using an app to relax and unwind.
- Learn progressive muscle relaxation techniques to release tension in your muscles.
- Walk together as a family.
- Consider keeping a journal to express your thoughts and feelings.
- Create a container where the family can share their worries or concerns.
Anxiety has the ability to affect aspects of our lives such as academics, work, health, and relationships with others. By recognizing our triggers and finding coping strategies, we not only free ourselves from anxious thoughts, but we also empower children to believe that they can successfully overcome the challenges that come with personal growth.
