Finding true happiness when we are suffering may seem impossible, but it is also the key to our recovery, healing, and well-being.
When we go through a difficult season personally, or witness the pain of others, our relationship to true joy or happiness can become complicated and confusing. Happiness may seem elusive, or it may feel like a betrayal, like something we don’t “deserve” during difficult times.
But enhancing our ability to notice and enjoy moments of beauty, tenderness, connection, and gratitude can actually have an enhancing effect on us. It can help us build resilience and fill our empty emotional tanks, which can enhance our healing and make it possible for us to show up in healing ways to others.
Teacher Wendy O’Leary shares a guided practice to focus our attention on the reality that shines alongside our real seasons of struggle.
Meditate to allow for true happiness, even in difficult times
Read and practice the guided meditation text below, pausing after each paragraph. Or listen to audio exercises.
Perhaps, like many, I wondered, How can I even think about being happy when I’m having a hard time right now?
or, How can I be happy when there is so much suffering in the world?
However, happiness cannot be achieved simply by meeting basic needs, it is also essential to our well-being and resilience. We need this resilience for ourselves when we struggle and to support others when they do. Both could be true.
Things can be difficult and we may also be able to see some happiness in life. It cannot be forced, so this practice is not an encouragement to push through difficult things. Instead, it’s a very gentle invitation to create a little space for goodness where you can enhance empowerment and well-being.
This practice is adapted from Rick Hansen’s practice of Taking Good.
- Let’s start by settling into a comfortable position. If it works for you, I invite you to close your eyes.
- Gently direct your attention to the felt experience of your body. You may feel your feet on the floor, the backs of your legs on a chair or pillow, or where your hands are touching. Direct your attention to any place where you can easily connect with the body’s sitting experience.
- Now, gently expand your attention to feel the sensations of the whole body Sitting, including body breathing sensations. The call here is for a broad, soft, receptive awareness of sitting the body and breathing the body.
- If difficult feelings or thoughts arise, this is not a problem. There is no need to push them aside. Acknowledge their presence graciously, and perhaps say to yourself, Oh, unpleasant thoughts or feelings. Then let them drift into the background as you focus on the foreground of the whole body experience while we settle here for a minute.
- Now, remember a time when you felt really happy. This may be a time when you feel peaceful and calm, or perhaps content, or even a joyful time. If there are some experiences vying for your attention, just choose one to practice together. There is no right or wrong choice here.
- Notice where you are during that experience and who you are with. Look around you and notice what else you see when you remember this experience. You may notice the sounds you hear. Were there any tastes or smells? Just be curious. What about physical sensations, such as the sun on the skin, feet in the sand, or even movement, such as body swaying or dancing? Just notice any physical sensations associated with the experience. Take it with all your senses.
- Now, let go of the specific experience and investigate for yourself. How does my body feel when you are happy, peaceful, content, or cheerful? What is this in the body? What is this in the mind? What is the state of your heart? You can even say to yourself, Oh, happiness is like that.
- Imagine allowing this feeling to expand throughout your body. Enjoy the experience of happiness, and allow it to grow and expand. You can even say to yourself, This feeling is worth keeping To help your brain remember that feeling and access it more easily. Oh, happiness is like that and it’s worth keeping. Enjoy the experience, grow the experience and remind yourself that it’s worth keeping. Happy feels like this.
- Remember, happiness is not in that specific experience you remembered. It is within you, and it is accessible. You just have to take a moment to call it quits and lean into the feeling of happiness. Happiness is like that.
- Before we conclude, let’s offer some good wishes. May we and all beings be safe. May we and all beings be healthy in body, mind and heart. May we and all beings be happy, truly happy, peaceful, content, and free. May our practice be beneficial to all beings.
- As you go through your day, you can set an intention to notice small moments of happiness, peace, and connection. Pause for at least three breaths to take it in, and notice it with all your senses. Notice how the body feels when experiencing happiness and invite this feeling of happiness to remain and even expand in the body, mind and heart.
Thank you for practicing with me.
