5 tips the happiness expert wants you to know

Find yourself in a slump or bombarded with negative thoughts? founder Happy newsEmily Coxhead reveals five tips on how to become happier

Firstly, there is no simple way to “be happier”, happiness does not come from a particular place, person or thing (although cups of tea and lying on the beach would certainly be at the top of the list for me).

We need to try to get away from this idea that after our next vacation, raise, new purchase, we will be happier because if there is an underlying problem, annoying thoughts or feelings, or generally just a reason to be unhappy, that problem will still be there no matter how much stuff gets in our way.

We can’t wake up one morning anxious and stress-free, that’s not how the world works

Of course, it’s not as easy as finding complete peace and happiness within yourself, we can’t wake up one morning free of anxiety and stress, that’s not how the world works.

What we can do is try to understand the underlying issues and try to build our strength and resilience so that we can first recognize our thoughts and feelings, but then also try to understand them and work through them whether that’s writing them down or talking to someone you trust.

It can be incredibly important and beneficial if you are able to share the load and shed a little of the weight you are carrying.

Here are five essential tips that may help you find a little happiness now or later…

How to be happier: Tip #1: Watch what you consume

Especially now, more than ever, we are constantly bombarded with terrifying headlines and statistics, not to mention scrolling through social media looking for glimpses of positivity, and are often faced with a whole heap of negativity, comparison and not feeling good enough.

Know that it’s okay to turn off news notifications if you’re feeling overwhelmed, and it’s perfectly okay to unfollow or “mute” people on social media who don’t make you feel good.

In the same way that you have (or should have) control over those around you in real life, you should also apply that to the “virtual world” as well.

How to Be Happier Tip #2 You can’t please all the people all of the time

I get it, it’s not as simple as just ignoring your boss’s comments or not taking into consideration something a friend said, these are all very normal situations that we often find difficult to handle.

However, as you go through life, there will be many people who come and go, the truth is that you cannot and will not please all of the people all of the time, this is something people say to me a lot, and it is one of my father’s favorite sayings but it is still something I have to constantly remind myself of.

You cannot and will not please all of the people all of the time

I think once you can realize and admit that there are certain things or ways or traits that some people won’t like or understand about you, it makes it a little easier to deal with losing touch with someone whether it’s gradual or suddenly.

Talking to people is very important and a great way to understand things and move through difficult situations even if it is difficult to do so.

However, sometimes it doesn’t work out and it may not be about anyone in particular and is likely completely out of your control.

How to Be Happier Tip #3 Find things or people that make you happy

We can quickly and often unwittingly get caught up in these thoughts about what should make us happy or what would make our friend or partner happy, and it’s really important to step back sometimes and think about what makes you happy. When was the last time you did something just for you?

Whether it’s swimming, baking, running, drawing, whatever brings you a little happiness, do more of it.

Read more: Mental Health Fixes – 13 women share what makes them happy

How to Be Happier Tip #4 Embrace what makes you…well, you!

We live in a world that unfortunately isn’t always designed to make us happy, it’s much quicker to point out our flaws – that we should have less wrinkled skin, fewer stretch marks, or shinier hair.

Every little part of us is what makes us who we are, tells our story and makes us different from the next person, it’s not always easy but we should be very proud of it.

Change doesn’t have to be groundbreaking or newsworthy, it’s often the smallest things that make a positive difference

Our body is the most amazing thing and takes care of us in ways we can’t understand sometimes, and we shouldn’t constantly blame it or think about how it could be or look better.

We would never do that to our mothers or our friends, so why do it to ourselves?

How to Be Happier Tip No. 5 Be the change

I know we hear this a lot; “Be the change you want to see” but it is a simple message that I think all of us can relate to.

Be the change you want to see

What will make the world a better place? I can think for example, if we were all kinder to ourselves and others, it would make a huge difference.

There are so many very small things we can do that would have a big impact if more of us did them; From picking up pieces of trash, writing to our grandparents or friends we haven’t seen for a while, or buying a colleague their favorite piece of chocolate.

Change doesn’t have to be groundbreaking or newsworthy, often the smallest things can make a much bigger positive difference than you’ll realize, it makes you feel good, it makes the other person feel good and it has a ripple effect beyond that.

You’re Amazing Just the Way You Are: How to Accept Your Perfectly Imperfect Self By Emily Coxhead Available for Buy from Amazon in the US and In the United Kingdom.

Subscribe to Happy newsFor every two newspapers we send to subscribers, we’ll send one to a school in the UK so children can hear about the good things happening in the world.

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